The Death of "Famous" People

Whitney Houston died the other night. While I am not a fan of death, I find myself apathetic about the whole thing. A person who I did not know, who did drugs most of her life, who let a man beat her, and who's own mother had to have an intervention court ordered passed away. I will pray for her family and the grief they must be going through right now, but I cannot find it in my heart or mind to care. Many people in my life have been taken from me. Those close and others only barely knew, and I think of them and what we did together on this short time on Earth. I have no fond memories of Mrs. Houston, and I guess that is where my apathy stems. I did not have a "hook-up" because of her most famous of songs, or take a girlfriend to see "The Bodyguard". I was not drawn in to her "reality" show like so many others. To me, she was just a woman who sang a song, made a ton of money, and smoked/snorted everything she made away.
     I am not trying to downplay the importance of life, or say your grief and sadness have no meaning. I can fully empathize with you, as I too know the pain of loss. BUT. I now get to listen to millions of people lamenting a person they didn't know. There will probably be plenty of "memorial" specials, and many famous people will get up on stage and say how awesome of a person she was. I don't buy it. I hear nothing about how she was an addict, and now I'm supposed shed a tear. The same came with the death of Michael Jackson. His death was crammed down my throat and everywhere people were crying like he was their own child/brother. If a normal drug addict or pedophile died in the apartment complex I live in, they would be taken away, cause of death determined, and their family would have a simple ceremony if they had any family left. Millions wouldn't be forced to watch about how they died, and the life they lived.
     Again, it is very hard to not come off that I dont give two shits about your pain. I do, for her family and friends, I feel for you and know your loss is hard. I am more pissed that normal people barely get anything, but because rich and "powerful" people knew her, she is going to have millions spent to tell the "story" of her and her life now. So to the family and direct friends of Misses Houston I say the following: I am terribly sorry for your loss and hope that happy memories soon overwhelm the pain your now experience.
To people who she didn't affect your life on a daily, or family basis: Get fucked and pay attention to the World and your own Country. There is plenty going on that is worth more than someone dying of either a drug overdose or complications of years of doing said drugs. Hundred of addicts and former addicts die everyday. Do something to STOP drug addition instead of just sitting there going "oh poor baby".

Being a Man

I have not posted here in quite some time, and I dont really know why. Like everyone else I have my fair share of annoyances and general griefs that are part of life. I guess, it's easy to say that my life is going amazingly well and that all my problems are gone, but we all know problems are a part of life. I went against someone who decided to make a public statement about a flag recently, but that felt more of blowing hot air than anything being accomplished. I think I was more bothered by men not being Men.

If I have an issue in my life I have no problems coming up to the person causing me injury and having a discussion... or thrown fist.. about this issue. I was raised by a father who took the needed amount of shit at work, and brought that home to his family. I will not say I felt loved as a child, but I never went without. Discipline I know first hand from my father, and it was attempted to teach me the worth of money. I have learned hard lessons about the later. My rant is that Men as it where are ceasing to exist.

My father and grandfather come from the.. dont call in, work your ass off, and die broken but satisfied in all that you do. They are Men. What I am seeing now is a complete lack of balls from the XY genome in America. Let us refer to this as the "Pussification of America". I was taught and raised to speak for myself and be a leader for my family. What I see is an entire group of "men" who cannot nor will not stand up for themselves in even the most basic fashion. I am not talking about people who go to the protests, they are an entire different matter. What I speak of is men who will take a minor slight, and instead of dealing with it as a Man, they bring it before the news, or smear it all over the internet, and sit back with a delighted shiver that they have aired their issue without reprisal. Simply I will say this:
Grow some fucking BALLS. If you have an issue, speak to the person you have issue with. Dont hide behind the media or your computers. Get face to face with someone, make an argument, and deal with the outcome.
The song Omerta by Lamb of God has a short spoken verse in the beginning that sums it all up.
"Whoever appeals to the law against his fellow man is either a fool or a coward. Whoever can not take care of themself without that law is both. For a wounded man shall say to his assailant, "If I live, I will kill you. If I die, you are forgiven." Such is the rule of honor.


I think that sums up what is means to be a Man.

Justin Beiber

I decided today that I would see why people either love this kid, or hate him with a passion. I watch about a minute of a video called "Baby". I have not heard so much music company pushed dribble since the 90's boy bands. This was crap. You can hear the edge of the harmonizer in his voice and the lyrics sound like they are written by a 10 year old girl. We will start my rant with the harmonizer. This section will be short. Ahem
A Harmonizer is used when people cant sing...Nuff said.
No talent kid. I'm guessing Usher found some white kid that can dance. He didn't need the moron to sing, but to dance, make little girls feel all warm and cuddly, and make him MILLIONS. And WTF is up with that retarded metro sexual haircut. Either you are a dude, or a chick, not have a damned feathered bowl on your head. I've seen pics of this pretentious fuck after shows and have heard about him needing naps during the day. I think he's some shit kid, who had a look, that makes people millions who will grow up to feel like he's entitled to get something in life. Maybe in 20 years he can team up with the Jonas Brothers and do a tour. Fuck Justin Beiber and if you fall into this shit, you deserve to be ripped off.

Why are people slow?

     I currently live in Saint Louis, Missouri. There are approximately 3 million people in the city and surrounding areas simply known as Saint Louis. With my former job as an alarm installer, and various travels in my life I pose this question tonight. Why are half the people in the United States so damned slow? Case in point: I went to the grocery store on Saturday, I did my shopping at a normal pace and ended up with less than 20 items. I decided that going through the "You Scan" line would be a "good idea". Please picture the following scene in your minds. There are four checking stations total, 2 left, 2 right. They are stacked so that there are 2 lanes with the "You Scan" Queen watching over us all laughing, thinking "Thank God I don't have to check them out." The left sides both lanes have people with cartloads of groceries and the Queen is reading a magazine. The Right side offers hope, at the far end is a woman who is scanning the last of her items, and a young mother with 3 items in her hand. This young mother has decided that bringing her son to the store and letting him roam free is a "good idea" The entire time I wait this child is messing with her so that she stops, looks at the boy, and tells him to quit. He then proceeds to run his hands all over the candy bars and gum in the "You know you really want this crap" stand. My seeming salvation stand in the woman who has removed her wallet from her bra, and has swiped her card. I glance at my phone, it is 12:30 PM. The child has begun dancing and the mother walked over to the Queen to barter over the fresh chicken that is leaking blood and chicken juice on the floor. The Bra Toter has swiped her card and is looking at the video screen. The time is 12:32. The child has begun to poke his fingers INTO the candy bars while the mother attempts to check out using her food stamps. Queen has gone back to her magazine, and the Toter... she has pressed the button and is looking at her receipt. The time is 12:35. The child is frantically getting his mother to look at him, and when she does, he waves. She goes back to throwing her things around and speaking, complaining of her woes as a single mother. The Toter has finished looking at her receipt and begin to slowly fold it into her wallet where she looks at it for a time, and returns the wallet to her Bra. The time is 12:40. As the Toter begin to leave the child is standing in the middle of the lane staring at me as if I had horns, picking his nose. I say "Excuse me" and the child looks. The mother looks at me and barks "It'll be just a damn minute," and begin to grumble about white people. The time is 12:45. As I get to the check out terminal, it takes me 2 minutes to ring out 13 items and pay. I leave the store at 12:47. 17 minutes I waited in a "fast checkout" lane.
     Ladies and Gentlemen. I fully ascribe to the speed of modern convenience. I like being able to get in and get out. If you are a person, who stops to turn, goes slow for no reason, acts as if they are owed something by the world, or feel like you are the only one that matters. FUCK YOU!!! I understand that many elderly move slow. I have no issue with this. They have earned that privilege by simply living as long as they have. If you are 35, and so fat you have to use one of those damned electric carts to get around, hog up the entire aisle and cause a major inconvenience for me because your fat ass wont walk. THAT I have issue with. I have issues with people who don't realize that you can drive faster than 2 M.P.H and make a turn. I have issue with people who take up an entire ANYTHING to themselves, so nobody else can get through when all it takes it a simple step forward or back. Do I feel I am owed anything by society? Not at all. Do I feel like I'm some King that people need to move for automatically? No. I do feel, very openly and plainly that society needs to take a step back and return to the days of people showing a little respect. Say..around 1950 without race discrimination. People cared and did what they could because that is what was RIGHT. It was not dog eat dog. It was very much, we are Americans, or whatever nationality, we are many people who live to protect and serve for all, as one.
     Sadly, Nobody gives a shit anymore about anyone else. I know I write this as a way to vent. I know few if any read this, but it's out there. Do I expect to start a revolution, but if one person stumbles across this, and one person can bring the stick of "I'm more special than you" out of their ass. Then I have done my job, but don't be surprised if some day, a very large Irishman walks up to you and removes that stick by force.

A Saturday Relaxing

I just paid off my truck yesterday and decided that today I wanted to kick back and think about the last 7 years of my life. Yes... 7 years to pay off a vehicle that was on a 6 year note. 12 extensions to the loans. Numerous letters explaining that if I didn't get them money soon, they would re-posses my vehicle, but there is it. My truck is a little beat up, but I treat it like a truck. I think back about what those seven years entailed, Failed marriage, failed friendships, failed life it would seem, but yesterday there is a Light. As I begin to drag myself out of the hole that was created when two children decided they wanted to be grownups. I'm beginning to see the end, and the promise of a new beginning. I think now, to the woman I love very deeply. My little apartment that is sparsely decorated, but everything within is mine. I look at the "final amount due" on the Bills that piled up from before and the totals are going down, little bits at a time. While I'm never sure my credit score will ever recover fully, they lie about not going back beyond seven years. I do know that life is beginning to look up. I do know that I will always fight the depression that was brought to fruition by trying to take life on my shoulders when I was not ready. I know that when the time comes to buy that next vehicle or home, the lender will look at me funny and there will be that tense time of... will they say yes or no... why haven't they called yet... etc. It is easy to sit back and look, saying I should have..would have..could have. Everything that has happened made me the man I am today. Good, Bad, and Ugly. Can I go back and change any moment of my past, No. Would I if I could... I don't know. I would have to wonder then, if I changed even something as small as when I ate lunch on a day. What would my life be like today? Would I be rich, broke, in a hospital, dead, or would I just be the same me as I am now? In retrospect, everything that has happened to me, has happened for some reason. For those reasons. I am here now typing words in a blog about nothing really. My thoughts and ideas about my life and perceptions. Do I have regrets in my life? Yes, but I would be hard pressed to find anyone who has none. So, from here I will continue relaxing this Saturday as a celebration. I'm celebrating the fact, that something I didn't want in the first place, is now Mine.

Why do people take things too far?

It will become plainly honest that I play a game called World of Warcraft by Blizzard Entertainment. WoW as many know it is a MMORPG, and Blizzard has spent a lot of time making a world that can be challenging and fun. My rant today is about the people who take the game way too far. There are many people who will ridicule someone because they cant hit as hard as someone else, or don't have what they consider the right equipment. These people will also endlessly heckle someone over the smallest detail. These are also the people that you can find logged into this game any hour of any day. They say that America has become the fattest country in the world, and it's no wonder. Too many adults and children spend all of their time sitting on their asses playing WoW, or any other game of it's type, or in front of the television. Nobody seems to want to get out of the house and enjoy our world, or all the infrastructure many communities builds. Park, Museums, Zoo's. They are all tourist attractions, but I have noticed something. On a beautiful day, I went to the city I live in's Zoo. I remember as a child going to this Zoo with my parents and it was crammed tight with people. The Zoo was still busy on this day 20 years later, but not as I remember it. The crowds were at the shows, but it wasn't near what is was then. Why? I am by no means a small man, but why cant we get out more? Why cant Americans get off our collective duffs and do something instead of increasing our chances for heart disease and shortened lifespans? Beyond the health risks... the afore mentioned "gamers" do not ever unplug. They know the right thing to have at any time and will make sure you know that think you are fail. It's a game.....I pay 15 bucks like you do. I don't care about your opinion. This... obsession isn't stuck to just this game. Any type of entertainment has it's own obsessive fans. They know everything and going to tell you that you and your team are wrong. This people can take a flying leap for all I care. It's my money, my time, and all of you who thing you know everything about everything can take a long walk off a short bridge.

My thoughts tonight

Tonight. I got into a conversation in a game about homosexuality. As I said. I do think Homosexuality is wrong. I will NOT on the other hand go about bashing or in any other way advocate violence against homosexuals. I want to know why it is considered wrong for me to speak up and say. I think homosexuality is wrong in my opinion. I'm not going to "gay bash" anyone. I'm not going to destroy a homosexual's property or follow them around spewing my beliefs at them. I made one statement and I have.. offended. No shit. I am not here to sit by idly and push my thoughts down so that others may force me to think a different way. This is what I think. I am not easily offended, and I believe that those who are need to get a grip on life. Life is not easy, or fair, or guaranteed to go your way. We are all allowed free will. We have all been given mouths with which we can make noises that other human interpret as speech. In our.. "modern" society the idea of going against something is.. taboo and wrong. So, you see me as wrong for saying I don't think homosexuality is right. Am I wrong for having gay and lesbian friends. I have told them what I feel, and it ended with that conversation. It is just that. We as people.... humans. Need to quit worrying about offending, and just talk to each other. We don't have to get along with everyone. Here is the other statement I will make this eve that may blow someones mind. I do not agree with homosexuality but I will protect someones right to live their life as they see fit with all that I can. There it is. Do I think homosexuality is right. No. I RESPECT other's thoughts and beliefs. Please respect mine. I'm not going hate you, but I'm Irish. We WILL tell you how we feel.